Over the last few months I haven't played much serious poker. A few tournaments, but every time I play I'm drunk and I haven't played very serious, or I think I'm playing serious but I'm playing poorly. No posts in a long time but that's why. I also haven't felt motivated to post to the blog at all. Got 14th out of 165 in the Aria Friday night tournament the other week (basically min cash), not much in results otherwise.
This last week someone I know, Billy Pappas (aka William Pappaconstinou or something, not sure of the exact spelling) made the final table of the WSOP Main Event. Billy plays a lot of poker lately and I feel like him and I are around the same skill level. Although I have nothing to base that on - I just know that he's playing 2/5 NL when he comes to Vegas and whatnot. I'm happy for him, but to be honest the situation makes me jealous. I'm rooting for him but as I work my 9 to 5 job, I can't help myself from being jealous that I'm not out there giving it a shot.
What have I done to put myself in that position, though? Nothing. I play some poker here and there, don't study at all, don't really put any effort into improving my game whatsoever. Sure, I'm trying when I'm at the table. But at this pace I'm going to turn into one of those guys that are 70 years old, still playing 1/2 NL, breaking even or losing. Talking about how "I used to play 5/10 NL" or "I won some tournament some time ago". I don't want to be that guy. I don't know if I honestly want to play poker professionally or not, but I know that I'm not giving myself the option either. I'm simply not improving and it makes sense - I'm not putting any effort into that.
I've lived in Vegas for 9 years. When I moved here I was trying to be a professional poker player. I had no job and I played a lot, and it seemed like it was working out for a short while. But I made mistakes then - didn't manage my money properly, didn't put a ton of effort into studying, and eventually it came crashing down. That happened after less than a year. What have I done in the last 8 years to improve the situation? Nothing. I've worked, I've played periodically, and I've studied the game the most minor amount. I'll buy a poker book, read the first 1/5 of it, and never finish it. I have a library of poker content that I haven't read, and what I've read I don't think I've put the effort in to really learn it.
After Billy made the final table it made me think, I need to start putting effort into this. I care about poker. I want to win. I want to be that guy. And I can! My wife supports the crazy dream I have. I wrote "stupid dream" originally but erased it. Is it stupid? No. Is it unrealistic? Today - yes. But if I put the effort in, maybe not. I need to at least start there and start putting the effort in to improve my game. I mean I have literally thrown away 8 years. If I don't start making incremental steps forward now, I'll be right where I am now in 8 years - playing low buy-in tournaments, playing 1/2 or 2/5 NL, complaining when I lose, dreaming of making the big time.
I know I've said this before countless times. I'm hoping that seeing Billy's success can really get me in gear though. I know in my heart that it can't happen overnight. But I think that I can start putting effort in, making some incremental changes, and eventually maybe I'll get there. Maybe I won't, too. But if I don't put in the effort, it's a guarantee that I'll never get there.
I started today by starting over on The Mental Game of Poker book. Another book I read 50% of or so, thought it was great, but took no real action on it. I started reading it and it had some questions it suggested writing down and really thinking about, so I did that. It also has the concept of "inchworm" where you think about the best and worst parts of your game, and you try to improve both ends. So I wrote down the perceived best and worst parts of my game today.
It was somewhat enlightening - I really didn't have much good to say about my game. I feel like there are some poker basics I still don't grasp or I just have a beginner's mentality in many ways. I'm going to post what I wrote down here, even though some of it is embarassing and stupid.
More posts to come after this too. I'm hoping I can spend time after work or at lunch (like I used to do when I started playing) learning the game and improving.
The Mental Game of Poker - first set of questions (page 18)
How much you knew the first time you played poker
Not much. I hadn’t played much as a kid or anything. Started playing some online just messing around and I literally knew nothing. I didn’t even know the rules of some games when I played at a dealer’s choice home game and I remember losing a huge Omaha pot because I didn’t understand Omaha, we played Chicago and I didn’t know if an ace was low or high, and so on.
The complexity of your thought process when making poker decisions now compared to when you first started really trying to improve
At least when I’m playing my “A” game, I am thinking about what other people might have and sometimes even what they think I have. I also consider things like if I call now, what will I do on a future street. I think about pot odds although I do ignore them sometimes. Overall I think that I consider others in the pot a lot more than what I used to. I also take others’ chip stacks into consideration a lot more than I used to when calling with a speculative hand, although I can ignore that as well depending on how I’m playing.
A mistake you recently discovered
I played an Aria tournament recently and got really deep and had a huge chip stack with about 12 left. I got all in pre flop against the biggest stack at the table. I had TT and he had raised it huge like 5x. I went all in. The decision itself wasn’t necessarily bad, but I didn’t consider how important my chips were at that point in the tournament and the fact that if I just let it go, I still had a great stack heading to the final table. Probably a ICM thing, I don’t really understand ICM or how to calculate it.
Decisions at the table that are made automatically
Folding really terrible hands especially out of position (assuming I’m not drunk)
Knowing what hands to play pre flop in which position (although I don’t always follow it)
Mistakes that don’t happen anymore
It’s actually hard for me to think of a bunch of mistakes I used to make that I don’t anymore. I think I am way more cautious about losing a MONSTER pot with a pretty weak top pair type of hand. I understand the hand rankings in any game I play (Omaha, etc) so I don’t think I am making mistakes related to that anymore.
Best and worst parts of my poker game today
- If I lose a few big hands in a row, I tend to get upset and can go on tilt. It can also cause me to stop playing for a long time.
- I will play hands sometimes even if I KNOW it’s a bad idea, because I’m behind or about to leave or whatever.
- I am terrible at reading peoples’ physical tells. If I try to read people, I often make the wrong decision based on something I think I saw.
- If I’m playing drunk I have a really hard time controlling myself and my bad decisions become worse and I play super loose.
- I don’t often apply correct pot odds when calling on a draw.
- I don’t count the pot, which leads to bad pot odds decisions.
- I don’t typically pay close attention to what others are doing at the table, so it’s hard for me to get a grasp of players’ tendencies before I get into a hand with them.
- Other people will annoy me by doing various things (winning a lot, thinking they are the shit, being rude or talking shit) and that puts me on tilt.
- I don’t take regular breaks which may negatively affect my mental state and concentration.
- I will get frustrated and can go on tilt if I’m playing for a while and don’t win.
- I don’t make an effort to make my physical movements consistent and reduce any physical tells I may be giving off.
- I get jealous of others for winning when I’m not, including people like my wife or friends. This can put me on tilt.
- I get annoyed and can go on tilt if I see my wife make a move that I think is not optimal.
- I don’t understand the details of ICM in tournaments so I’m unable to apply it to my tournament decisions well.
- I tend to do mechanical things where I don’t totally understand the reasoning behind it (c-betting a ton of flops, etc) and it can put me on tilt if it doesn’t work.
- Properly executing my strategy can put me on tilt if it doesn’t work, or especially if it doesn’t work several times in a row.
- I used to study poker a lot early in my career, and I don’t study anywhere near as much anymore.
- I feel like I am entitled to win if I put a decent amount of hours in. If I play every day for a week and don’t win for example, I get very frustrated and might quit for a while.
- I can play draws too strongly even in spots where it’s not a good idea, if I feel like I’m not winning enough and need to get ahead.
- I tend to hold it together if I lose ONE big pot (although see “worst” above).
- I am able to make some big folds.
- If I’m playing my best I take my time and really think through decisions.
- I am starting to think more about what other people have and how they will react to my actions, or what they think I have.
- I am capable of making some very thin value bets to get max value.
- I am able to fold some very appealing hands preflop (like small pairs) if I am not getting proper odds to call.
No comments:
Post a Comment