Yesterday I went to the Riviera. The game was by far the best game I have seen since I started playing again recently. Completely moronic play. I ended up losing $265.
Today I went to the Venetian. Played for about 5 hours. Lost $42.
Combined with the massive $422 loss last Friday at Red Rock, I'm down $729 in the last 14 hours of play over 3 sessions. That's very demoralizing. After Friday I felt awful. After last night I felt terrible too.
I started out today down $200 as well. I just had some hands that didn't work out... TT, JJ, just didn't work out. So I end up raising and c-betting and having to fold. I also ran QQ into KK (only lost 40 because the other guy did not play it well, imo).
So I'm down $200 and feeling bad about it. I talked to my wife on the phone and she was super supportive and nice about it, and told me that I'd come back. She always says that, but I do tend to beat myself up after I start losing. Usually the first hand or two is fine, but as they start piling up I really start getting a bad, negative attitude.
I have always wanted to play more aggressive. That's what I've been doing lately, and it's been working OK, but I've had some downswings. I'm no expert and I'm sure that I'm making mistakes. I have considered going back to the super nitty style that I have played in the past. It's boring but I do end up generally winning money, albeit really slowly.
I'm playing aggressive, but I am trying to play well. I'm reading books. I'm listening to podcasts. I'm thinking my decisions through. Sometimes the reasoning is flawed, but I am trying.
So then a calm feeling came over me as I came to a realization. I want to play this way. I haven't had success with it in the past, but I believe I can do it. It's how the great players play, and I can be a great player. I have a dedicated poker bankroll right now, so I don't have to worry about losing the money. And worst case, if I do lose the money, that's fine. I feel fine with that and if that worst case scenario happens, I'll simply stop playing poker for a while. Probably a long while. Maybe I'll wait until my next birthday and start another bankroll at that point.
But for now - I'm playing the way I want to play. I need to play smarter, and definitely tighten up in certain spots. But when I sense weakness, fuck it. I'm going to throw that big bet out there. I'm not going to cry when it doesn't work. I'm going to put out thin value bets. I'm going to double barrel, and even throw out an occassional triple barrel sometimes. I'm going to call when I don't have the best odds if I have a plan to raise someone off of a hand later, and I'm going to follow through with those plans.
I'm going to be the best poker player I can be, even if it breaks me. If my remaining $1500 doesn't give me enough room to prove successful at 1/2 NL, so be it. But until that money is gone, I'm going to try like hell and play my ass off.
I had some pretty sick hands lately. I don't have much time to write about them right now, but here is the most painful one. :-)
Yesterday at Riviera. I have AA in early position. There is a straddle to 6, and I limp. Button raises to 20. 2 callers. I reraise to 80. The button calls all in for about 60, and the small blind calls (whoa). He had another $150 behind. Flop comes Q-9-7. He checks, I bet 100, he goes all-in, I call. He had 8-7. River, 7. So I lose a $550 pot there. The button had A-K so he was drawing dead basically.
I had some other bluffs go wrong lately, so I think I need to re-evaluate my big bluffs. I think small bluffs are probably a good idea, and maybe bigger bluffs are not unless I have a good reason to think they will work. For example, take a look at this hand. I did not play it well on any street really.
I have 8-8. I limp, guy in the blind raises to 25, another guy calls, I call. I probably should have just folded, but we all had big stacks so that's how I rationalized it. Really though a fold would have been better, that was just too much to call. Flop is 2-3-7 I think. All cards under my 8s. The raiser bets 30, other guy calls. Now this is a really small bet, I didn't know what to do, so I just called. Turn was a jack. Raiser bets 30 again, the other guy calls. At this point I'm really confused and I just feel like those are weak ass bets. And the other guy calling I feel is super super weak. So I raise to 125. Unfortunately the raiser called, the river was a queen, and he went all-in (and I folded). He had Q-Q and rivered top set.
So many bad things about that one. The 30s looked weak, but the 25 preflop was super strong. And this guy was an older guy. So I think this was a case of the guy not really understanding bet sizing. On the flop I can see calling (or even raising) but on the turn when the guy fires out again into 2 people, that just isn't a bluff I don't think. And he's probably not doing it with 10s, or some smaller pair, or AK. He just has something and it's time to fold. Another problem is that if I did read him as weak and I wanted to raise, 125 was WAY too small. Before my raise, the pot had 75+90+60 in it - $225. So then I put in $125, bringing the pot up to $350. And he only has to call $95. So he's getting 3.5 to 1 odds there. Granted, I'm sure he's not thinking of the odds, and obviously I wasn't either, but that is too tempting. If I really wanted to raise, I guess I should have made it $250 or something. But the better play would have been to just fold. Actually, fold preflop.
I'm out. But I'm not giving up. I'm playing tomorrow and damn it, I'm going to play my heart out.
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